GC is at it again. You’ve read how he left me stranded in a vehicle on Mother’s Day with both kids and no refreshments, no bathroom, and no toys for 2 hours. You’ve read how he did it to me AGAIN the following weekend for another hour. But this week? This week tops them all….
GC has this regular thing that you can set your watch by. I mean, really, it’s ridiculous. You can guarantee that the first thing he will do when he walks in the door is head straight for the bathroom. It doesn’t matter if he just made a quick run to the store and went before he left. He will still head straight for the bathroom when he comes in. The smells that emunate from the bathroom confirm that he is indeed, full of poop.
This particular morning, he comes in and heads straight for the bathroom. I am in the middle of eating breakfast. He starts texting me:
GC: Please come here.
Me: I’m eating.
GC: Well I need T.P.
Me: In the bathroom closet
GC: Well, it’s not like I can get up and get it.
Me: Why not? I do it all the time.
GC: Real funny.
Me: What?! I’m serious.
GC: No, there is no tp in the closet.
Me: Yes there is. A whole bunch. Look for it.
GC: No, it is not
Me: Look. I’m eating. You don’t want to inhale the smell of my poop when you are eating. AND if I have to come in there to give you TP thats RIGHT THERE in the closet, I’m gonna smack you.
My phone is quiet for a few minutes, then I receive this text:
“I flushed already.”
Oh no, he didn’t!!
Oh yes, my friends, he did.
As if flushing at that point is going to solve anything.
I am 100% convinced that the man is full of shit. Pun intended.
Now, I know you’ve got some good stories to tell about people who do crazy things. Why don’t you post it and run over to Kristi’s and link up there and here? You know you want to.