>Guest Blog: Milk of Momnesia

>Today I am very pleased to tell you that one of my favorite bloggers is here with a guest post. You met her yesterday as the Flavor of the Week (click here if you missed her interview). Please give a hardy welcome to Ericka from Alabaster Cow

Milking It

My right breast, currently the size and  disposition of a small angry baby’s head, is stuffed inside a cylindrical Tupperware container.  My husband and I are on the way to Dallas for a little R&R and what should be a peaceful ride spent reading and silently threatening to write about people I spy on the road is instead dedicated to milking myself.  When I was in the third grade and I tried to imagine what my life would be like as an adult, this certainly wasn’t part of the picture.

There is an ulterior motive to this trip and it’s formally known as “operation weaning.” My daughter is almost fourteen months and uses me as a night time pacifier so I’ve decided to take back my boobs and help her sleep less restlessly in the process.  The idea is all well and good except for the fact that Matt and I are distraught to leave her for the week (okay, Matt’s distraught, I’m distraught and balancing ticking time bombs on my chest.  When these babies go off it won’t be pretty) and the fact that my boobies are growing by the minute.  I always wanted my boobs to grow magically overnight but I can’t say adopting the ability to offer strangers a refreshing glass of milk at will was part of that fantasy.

Sure, it’s painful.  I feel the slight heat in the lumpy tissue beneath my fingers, the hardened shell of what once was an average looking breast.  But the sting runs a little deeper knowing this chapter of my life is coming to a close.  Knowing my baby is growing up.
Between milkings I glance at the empty car seat out of habit.  I absently rifle through my purse for cheerios or a sippy cup.  And when I realize there’s no need for any of those things right now, I become a little sadder.

Maybe a glass of milk would cheer me up…


Thanks for the guest post, today, Ericka. I hope you are enjoying your vacation. Don’t forget to leave her lots of milky love on her blog. If you don’t know who she is, you are really missing out!! Hope you are having a great weekend!


11 thoughts on “>Guest Blog: Milk of Momnesia

  1. >Oh the pain of the swollen boobies. And to me, it just looked…bizarre. And even more bizarre when they would suddenly start firing off at will…theirs.

  2. >I nursed for 11 months with absolutely no problems. AFTER I weaned my daughter I developed a clogged duct. Worst pain I have ever experienced! It took my boobs a while to get the message, but they did. Yours will too. In the meantime, hang in there! And enjoy your child-free time together!

  3. >Weaning is never easy. It's been about 3 months since I did it with my final child, but your post just brought it back like it was yesterday.Say hi to Dallas for me. I moved away about two years ago and still miss it terribly!

  4. >I can certainly relate, even though it's been years for me. I remember that time all too well. I actually wore cabbage around in my bra as if no one could smell that horrific stench. But seriously, you crack me up. Thanks for the laugh. Hope your trip turns out to be a good one inspite of all the weaning from the ticking time boobs. Haha.

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